The Simpsons

No, not the cartoon. I'm talking about Ashley and Jessica. Actually, just the first one.

Now, I know that it's really unfair (and not all that interesting) for me to make a 25% effort at hate-blogging just ONE of the many pop stars I consider to be totally worthless in terms of their vocal, stylistic, cultural or other philosophical contributions (and I will accept contributions in ANY of these categories), BUT --> I hate Ashley Simpson. Ok, I have certain friends who object to the word "hate" to I'll just say that I "hate minus one" AS.

I pretty much agree with this website's analysis of the seriality and decreasing validity of pop stars like Ashley, as well as the bottom line it points to about Jessica's more or less "A-list" qualities (and Britney's bomb body). I have not been able to STAND Ashley since her reality show first came out (which was SO clearly negotiated with MTV as part of her sister's contract), but what I hate most about her is not that she can't really sing, isn't that attractive, has no song writting ability, and very little charm. What I hate about her is much more difficult to articulate and goes back to what I dislike SO MUCH about Orange County pop culture -->

Look at Ashley's videos and she is delberately constructing/calling upon a middle class white grunge California culture that is SO played out, doesn't really exist, and if it does, shouldn't. People criticize rappers and other pop stars for having videos full of Cristal and mansions with pools galore, but I am MORE disgusted by this yellow-tinted-lense, two car garage, skateboarders reacting against the sytem but still having stay at home moms who serve them Sunny-D, angry middle class wannabe alternapunk THING that Ashely et al. tap into with their videos. At least rappers CAN/DO live the way they pretend to in their videos...I guarantee you between her trips to Rodeo Dr. and 5th Ave. Ashley is not hanging out in some ugly house in CA (of course decorated in lots of earth tones, wood, etc.).

Before my miraculous escape from Orange County into the equally warped but MUCH more interesting world of boarding school, I simply could not STAND my (South) Orange County classmates with their PERFECTLY fine-tuned (and highly expensive) attempts to LOOK like exactly what they were not -- paying $20 for a Burger King t-shirt to, what, look like they work at a fast food place and are on a lower middle-class track that their $2 million dollar homes don't match very well with? I understand that I'm making myself susceptible to an "authenticity" debate (is it less POSER for boarding school kids to dress like models than for rich OC kids to dress like fast food employees?), but this is my blog, SO THERE :) NOTE: This is also what distressed me so much when I moved to Cairo and saw my Egyptian undergrad classmates -- they are *the* typification of ridiculous SoCal "bum" style (PERFECTLY fitting and clean grung t-shirts, perfectly trashed and low-slung jeans, often with flip-flops, baseball caps...it's like: ok, so you look like a California construction worker...now what?).

It's hilarious to contrast Ashley Simpson's reality tv series -- which revealed her to be living in a compound of chic LA condos with a bunch of similarly-privelged and parentally-funded youth (usually on tenative talent development contracts with various record co's), and then see in her videos these fictitious suburban California homes she and her angry-but-pop friends inhabit. It's the "look how destructive I am...I'm going to knock things over and jump up and down" but then the maid cleans up the mess THING.

UGH. I really can't stand her. I also don't feel like places like that really exist. A LOT of artists call upon this fictitious CA middle class space (as do a lot of films, actually), but I tend to see California in a much more stratified way. First of all, I've never seen (or almost never seen) a white OC teenager working in a fast food place...I've seen lots of struggling Hispanic people working there, but a fellow San Clement classmate? No. Second, I've never seen neighbourhoods like these. You have gated communities, apartments, and low-income communities...you don't have this perfectly-not-rich-but-not-poor middle class space that these videos pretend you have. At least I haven't seen it.

So -- anyway, check out this link and the one above for further Ashley bashing. I can't believe she actually tried to lip-synch on SNL (I know I'm WAY behind the news on that one, but I was just sitting here thinking: "I hate Ashley Simpson" and decided to blog about her). I encourage you to post comments about other people YOU hate (that I can opine on ) in the comments section.

VC