VC Survives Attack, Sees Haifa

My second day in Israel was a bit of a disaster (which was thankfully rescued by a really nice evening). I got a late start and was assaulted by a taxi driver. I thought about not blogging about this, because I don't like to carve bad memories into e-stone, but it was kind of an important occurrence. I got in the taxi to go to the bus station, and I realized JUST as we pulled away (less than one block...) that my money was in my other bag. I asked him to stop the car so I could get it, and he said he had to do this huge circuit (like we'd literally gone 25 meters) around like half of our area of town on these one-way streets, and I knew it was a scam (Tel Aviv is very developed and international, but the taxi drivers are notorious). Not thinking much of it, I just said to him: "Wait here, and I'll be RIGHT back," knowing that my guesthouse was literally almost right behind us...like less than a 3 minute walk and in sight of the car...well before I knew it, when I was opening the door, totally unaware of any tension at all, I feel him tugging on my backpack and screaming "Give me money!" and before I knew it he was physically hitting me. I'm not kidding that I was SO stunned I remember thinking: "Oh my god, I'm actually in a fight and someone is striking the side of my head" before I even reacted! It was causing a scene because I was half out of the car and we're both screaming and I'm clearly being attacked and he even knocked my glasses (which were like $150 at my favourite new department store, Beyman's, in the newish Four Seasons in Cairo) off my face and underneath his seat. A woman intervened, trying to call the police, and I just kept saying "Of course I'll pay you!" but he was totally hysterical. The solution we worked out (to make a long and upsetting story slightly less long and upsetting) was to have him make a U-turn back to the guesthouse, which as I said required 3 car lengths of driving, and wait with my glasses held hostage for me to return with the money. I was SO shaken as the woman negotiated the solution and he was still screaming at me that I started to involuntarily choke up, and she was like "Just try to calm down..welcome to Tel Aviv taxi drivers" at which point I managed a "I'm live in Cairo, I know!" as he drove away and I help back tears. It was one of those bad, embarrassing, and just overall crappy experiences where you HAVE to cry to get over it, because it's so upsetting that you can't stop thinking about it, so finally when I paid and got in the next taxi, and had my glasses back on to hide my upsetness, those tears ROLLED. The taxi driver must have thought I was insane, because we were making pleasant conversation (so I could distract myself) about some Israeli guy who has been in prison for the past 20 years (I couldn't understand why), interspersed with me totally crying. Oh well!

I made it to Haifa late, experienced the TOTAL carelessness with which the Lonely Planet chapter on Haifa was written, and as a result ended up at a bus station way out of town and nowhere near ANYTHING. I made it on a bus to the Stella Maris Carmelite Church (google it yourself, I didn't get the big deal and even the supposedly-good ceiling was a total disappointment) and was then TRICKED, by Lonely Planet and religious zealots, to THINKING I'd seen Elijah's Cave when I actually hadn't. Basically, in Stella Maris church, they have an area they CLAIM is the place where Elijah hid from King Ahab and Queen Jezebel after slaying the 450 priests of Ba'ai; (see Kings I: 17-19) [that's TOTALLY stolen from Lonely Planet...that Haifa chapter had to be good for something if not its maps or schedules!], but it's not. Lonely Planet had the cave on a hill in a location that I totally couldn't find, so I kept climbing up and down this huge hill looking for it (even taking a photo of another totally random unrelated monument), and even asked someone at Stella Maris where it was, who told me that the one in the church IS the cave, and only Greek Orthodox people think it's the one on the hill I couldn't find, which he also couldn't point me to. I left Haifa a disappointed, but for the fact that the taxi driver who took me to the train station was the polar opposite of the one I'd met in the morning in Tel Aviv, as he took me to the train station even though he wasn't on shift (I flagged him driving home) and accepted the 20 shekles I had, despite the fact that the fare is like 30-35.

I took the train home, which was MUCH nicer than the bus (and the same price), except for the fact that you can't enjoy the gorgeous Israeli countryside because the windows are have this weird tinted/dirty thing going on. Really unfortunate, since it's a beautiful train ride. It was a bit weird, because, and I am not exaggerating, I was one of THE only civilians on a train full of young soldiers, and I even got a couple photos of the train station where there is literally no one in sight NOT wearing a uniform (many carring huge rifles) -- I tried to joke with a coffee girl at the train station, saying: "Am I the only person NOT in the army, here? Where are all the other people?" but she explained (not connecting with my humour) that they were all on their way home for the holiday. [Remind me that I want to talk more about the oddness of the military culture, here]

I went to dinner at my new Top 5 favourite restaurant, called Big Mama's, which served homemade pasta etc. and where I had my first real focaccia since Rome more than a year ago, and *the best* pasta (4 cheese, of course) of my life. The cheeses were not my favourite, although they were really fresh, but what was so amazing was how fresh the pasta was. I want to blog about this more when I have time, but the food in Israel is UNBELIEVABLE fresh.

I then visited the oldest part of Tel Aviv (which is very SoHo-ish...kind of re-done, manicured style on top of historical landmark buildings) where the "founders" (4 of them) and the "intellectuals" (only a few more) literally carved up Tel Aviv according to a map they made in the sand on the beach and said "ok, how will we make this city?" I loved it in this part of the city,and would totally buy a home there if I could. Really architecturally interesting, and a great atmosphere.

I woke up super early this morning and, determined to do Haifa properly, checked out of the hotel adn took all my stuff BACK to Haifa, where I learned that although a beautiful hillside-terraced city (idyllic in many was in the way a lot of South Orange County is...felt very similar in an odd way), it's SUCH a pain to navigate when your guide sucks and you don't have a car. I was hell-bent on seeing the Baha'i gardens, which really were magnificent, and was even offered entry to the Shrine of the Bab because the people working there thought I was Baha'i. When I refused to go in (even though I really wanted to!) they were confused, and were also distraught that they'd already secretly clicked their headcounter thingy when I walked past, and were sad to find out I wasn't Baha'i and was just another tourist. You need to google it or see my photos, but these gardens were breathtaking. I mean...such harmony, and SO well-maintained. It REALLY was an experience just to walk through that environment...I mean a kind of transcendental experience, if it's not too cheesy to say that. I then located Elijah's Cave for the NEXT time I come back (who knows when that will be), but didn't push myself to see it, since I was rushing to make the last trains before Passover started (and I'd be stuck, unable to get to my home for tonight in Jerusalem), and, as I did for most of the past two days in Haifa, spend a lot of time walking around to no end to do simple things like enter the train station.

I took the train back to Tel Aviv and then to Jerusalem, where I am now, and where I made it to my more-than-decent hostel with minimal hassle (the taxi driver was an Arab Israeli, still Muslim in fact, and we had fun speaking some Arabic...GORGEOUS eyes!). I then walked to the Old CIty just to get a peek for tomorrow's tourism, and wandered all throughout the ENTIRE thing -- from the New Gate and the Christian section, through the Armenian section, the Jewish section and finally the Muslim section. I really want to write more, but am eager to publish this so I'll cut it short, but I'll just say that I need to talk, tomorrow, about my total befuddlement with the holy site visitation process, here, and want to also blog about the embarrassing time I had at the Church of the Holy Sepulchre.

In the meantime, I'll leave you with two more bits of irony:

1. The bus driver in Haifa defiantly BLASTING Christian rock music (in English) as Jewish passover began.
2. A guy, today, in the Church of the Holy Sepulchre CUTTING IN LINE (a big line) in front of everyone else to touch Jesus's tomb. I actually started laughing out loud, which is when I knew I had to get out of there.

Remind me that I also want to talk about my anticlimactic exit from Damascus Gate into East Jerusalem, and the AGAIN amazing dinner I had (just now, at Riff Riff Sandwich Bar -- smoked turkey and Swiss panini!).

Well I know some of you have ALSO read the letter I got from Yale telling me that I'm going to be either accepted or, more likely, waitlisted, which I think was really considerate of them to let me know.

It's nearly midnight, so I'd better run, but expect a post from me tomorrow night telling you about my night tonight and my day tomorrow in Jerusalem. I will also hopefully get to talk, at some point, about the food, the army, and the men ;p [army men as food ... just kidding]

VC