Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Unending Chunkiness, Global Edition

Hey everyone, well let's review what's happened since the last time I've blogged:

My maid and bowaab stole all my things, I missed my flight out of Egypt, shipped my worldly possessions to NYC, finally made it to Athens (only long enough to rush to the Acropolis and then back to the airport) with the help of some Cairene angels, spent my first night ever in Brooklyn and was reunited with two of my best friends (including one's much-anticipated girlfriend), came home to California, changed fuses on a car, was mistaken (with my mother) for Iranian, discovered that my weight gain since I was last in the States (18 months ago) is 23 bootyliscious pounds that my NYC friends politely tell me is flattering, flew BACK to NYC, moved into my new place (the bamboo garden isn't all that), got reunited with another best friend and her boyfriend (who I really like) as well as two exes (including one bushy-tailed pookie), had more nice meals than was necessary in a 72 hour period (one of them involving an embarrassing incident when one of my aforementioned best friends, working in counterterrorism, agreed with me that our hot waiter was Pakistani, except when I got her to ask if he was from Lahore he was confused, offended that she might be using dirty language with him, and finally clarified that he was Puerto Rican), saw a really cute Broadway play (The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee), furnished my entire new studio (proving that Lesbians and residents of Brooklyn can both still have really good taste) and flew BACK to CA. Oh yeah: I also got a New York mobile number again (YAY!), and had all my things released from customs (where they were under a mysterious but easily-solved "agricultural hold" -- like I'd EVER touch a piece of fruit or buy a plant, lol) and was mistaken for Punjabi (mistaken for Iranian and Punjabi in the same week -- how's THAT for a versatile look?). Oh yeah X 2: Even though I've been too tired/busy/lazy to email her, I did NOT forget to get a certain Pakistani-American someone the bronze jewelry she wanted!

I may have missed something. I'm a little tired that in the past two weeks I've flown from Cairo to Greece to New York to California to New York to California (not including the stopovers United kindly offered me), but I've gotten a ton of Arabic done on all these flights, and I suppose I'm reasonably happy.

A few lightening impressions with not much explaining, so pick what interests you and call or email if you really want to know what I'm talking about (no hard feelings if you don't, lol):

* Be kind to those around you, because you never know when you might need to stay the night with a crazy Japanese girl and cash-in on your good person points.

* Shipping cargo on Emirates is REALLY cheap, but costs a lot of time, so if you're NOT me and actually have a job, in which case the opportunity cost has a financial element, then just pay excess baggage and move on.

* Don't have ANY mail sent to your parents. Your mother might get a gold amex in your name while you're gone, and that's a very slippery slope.

* At least four people in Cairo really care about me and are there for me, which isn't bad for two years in a city I hated.

* Egypt has a culture of dishonesty that pervades every aspect of society (from business to family) that has nothing to do with poverty, no matter what anyone says...it might be about more abstract understandings of "ownership," though, as a much-valued Palestinian/Jordanian friend from Afghanistan has said.

* If you want a man, and you go after him, then you can usually get him (and I'm NOT talking about MY experience!! I'm talking about the experience of two girls mentioned in this blog entry!) [EDIT: I just realized that both these girls were after Palestinian guys, so maybe I should say: If you want a Palestinian man, and you go after him, then you can usually get him...even though I got absolutely zero action when I was in Palestine!]

* Orange County is more gorgeous than I realized, but just as dead as I always suspected. Not only is it the ultimate example of money doesn't equal class, but it is also bereft of any cultural outlet whatsoever minus the ubiquitous Blockbuster. I like it here so long as I don't go outside (which, since my mother did an amazing decorating job, is fine with me).

* People in NYC are absolutely as hot as I remembered. I shouldn't say "hot." I should say: "Put-together and in-shape." New York City is the only place in which even that dumpy guy who in another city would be president of his local anime club and 200 pounds overweight STILL manages to hit the gym four times a week (even if it does nothing for his social skills).

* People at Columbia Law living in Lenfest (SO FAR...hopefully I'll be wrong later) are fit but unfriendly. My last full day in New York (day before yesterday), I crossed paths with SIX people in my building, NONE of whom met my eye or responded to my smile and under my breath "hey," except one girl who HAD to say hi after I surprised her when the elevator doors opened and I almost walked into her -- she was just coming back from a run (as 4 of the 6 were coming or going for a run...high-strung over-functioning and high-rent-paying law students are apparently fond of running) and had her leg up and IN the frame of the elevator on the lobby to stretch, so it was sort of embarrassing for her when the doors opened faster than she was expecting and her thigh was in my face (that's very NYC, though, for someone to only say hello AFTER their thigh has been in your face, lol).

* With only a couple notable exceptions (and WOW were they exceptions) I choose friends really well. I have five really close friends in New York who I really know I can count on (there should be a sixth, but she is still lost in the chaos of her first year law summer), and in Cairo I have at least four...then there's Jordan, Kabul, Tel Aviv....My life is really full and rich from these people, and I have to remember that! I also might have a small family, but I have a good one, and it was so nice seeing (in addition to my mother, obviously) my really awesome sister...so excited that today I get to see one of my nieces, again, who has promised to kick my butt in bowling.

* People's moms love me and I love moms. (that's a simple one) SOME people's moms who love me also love cute clerks at Juicy Couture who in tern love the daughter of the mother who in tern loves me, which means I'm only two degrees of separation from being loved by one of the hot guys working at Juicy Couture (it's too bad they don't have the men's line, there, otherwise I would have had to try on a scandalously tight pair of jeans, right?).

* I really have grown up and become more secure (mostly just in the past few months, lol), and it's been tested. I accept and let go better than I used to, I'm more forgiving of people being human, and I'm less threatened and less prone to seek/need validation than before. (This one's in bold because it's the most important)

Two quotes of the past two weeks:

1. From Oprah's show on how debt tears apart marriages (with a really awesome therapist who shocked me with how much I liked her...Dr. Robin?). She was responding to a husband who explained that he's just a very private person, and that's why he doesn't like to talk about what's going on inside him, emotionally:

"You were not BORN private. You were born free and whole."

She went on to explain (as I was kind of learning from two different guys in Cairo, one of whom has appeared on this blog as Dubai guy) that you BECOME private when you are taught to fear expression, and when you are taught that you need to protect yourself by retreating, emotionally.

2. From today's nytimes.com front page:

"Interactive Feature: Unending fury in MidEast."

Well that's not a quote but a hyperlink. I have to say it rather poignantly conveys a situation that I find too sad and baffling to really talk about (two of my favourite countries I've ever visited at war). I like the quote because it implies a certain spectator agency in the process, and after all, aren't we all accountable, somehow, to what's happening, there, and it's unendingness?

VC