I have been promising for a while, now, to deliver a post discussing pressing issues of the day, or at the very least, my favourite songs and videos on the air right now.*
It's nearly 4AM and I'm not going to do that, now, but I do want to give my readers a preview of one of the songs to make the list: "My Humps," by the Black-Eyed Peas. Now, I have a lot to say about this group (read: I have some things to say about the singer-chick's rockin' bod), but I'll save it. For now, enjoy these HILARIOUS lyrics. To avoid certain readers' inevitable (and highly inappropriate!) questions, NO I do not identify with this song (so he says ;p).
VCWhat you gon’ do with all that junk?
All that junk inside your trunk?
I’ma get, get, get, get, you drunk,
Get you love drunk off my hump.
My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump,
My hump, my hump, my hump, my lovely little lumps. (Check it out)
I drive these brothers crazy,
I do it on the daily,
They treat me really nicely,
They buy me all these ice-ys.
Dolce & Gabbana,Fendi and then Donna
Karan, they be sharin’
All their money got me wearin’
Fly gearrr but I ain’t askin,
They say they love my ass ‘n,
Seven Jeans, True Religion's,
I say no, but they keep givin’
So I keep on takin’
And no I ain’t taken
We can keep on datin’
I keep on demonstrating.
What you gon’ do with all that junk?
All that junk inside that trunk?
I’ma get, get, get, get, you drunk,
Get you love drunk off my hump.
What u gon’ do with all that ass?
All that ass inside them jeans?
I’m a make, make, make, make you scream
Make u scream, make you scream.
Cos of my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump.
They say I’m really sexy,
The boys they wanna sex me.
They always standing next to me,
Always dancing next to me,
Tryin’ a feel my hump, hump.
Lookin’ at my lump, lump.
U can look but you can’t touch it,
If u touch it I’ma start some drama,
You don’t want no drama,
No, no drama, no, no, no, no drama
So don’t pull on my hand boy,
You ain’t my man, boy,
I’m just tryn’a dance boy,
And move my hump.
*By "on the air" I mean the four channels on the Hotbird satellite that I turn to for music video entertainment: VIVA Polska (a Polish music video channel that's pretty good, since Polish rap is SO gangsta'), 102.5 RTL (Italian, very good), 123LiveSat/6 (this has the best videos, but plays them on rote repeat and has no live programming...which means that when they misalign the video and sound, as they often do, you have to wait for it to cycle around again [a couple hours] for the people's lips and lyrics to match!...it's an Arab station that also has at-times distracting ads for phone sex hotlines blocking the screen, but I guess it's the soft-porn quality of the station that makes it so good, because it has videos for dance/techno songs that are really creative and racey and not shown on other channels), and Gay TV (which is NOT a porn channel, but an Italian-run station that basically just plays music videos, has a few amusing talk shows, and once a week has a gay-themed but not-pornographic film).