Russian Chicks, Mexican Grabs, and My LSAT

Well I composed a blog a few days ago on the topic of Russian chicks and another topic that I can't remember, now, but my computer, for about a week, now, has been resetting itself, [observe my convoluted, but proper, use of commas] and I lost EVERYTHING. I think it was a conspiracy between the intelligence agencies CURRENTLY monitoring all my activities, and vestiges of the Russian KGB, because even Microsoft Word, in which I'd placed a copy of the blog for spell checking, could not recover the document!

This is going to be a SUPER blog, because you will get photos of Russian pop stars, English lessons, photos of my flat, AND metaphysical musings about my life and the lives of the people I care about.

Let's do it -->

Lip-Locking Lolitas

Some of you might remember the sexually ambiguous Russian 1.5-hit wonders back in 2002/2003, known collectively as t.A.T.u. (sounds like "tattoo") who caused controversy (and high record sales) with their on and off-camera refusals to confirm or deny their status as a couple. They were most well-known for their single "All the Things She Said" (video featuring them in school girl uniforms making out in a shower), and I have to say that the new single from these post-Gorbachev lolitas, "All About Us" is a current fav of mine (in that simple EuroPop kind of way), and also demonstrates a sincere ability on the part of these youngsters to not just make steamy videos, but improve their English skills as well. In their newest single, they seem to be experimenting with pronoun usage:

"They say don't trust you, me, we, us."

It might sound like Lena and Yulia are uncertain of which pronoun is appropriate, but as a devoted semiotician, I think that what we are really seeing, here, is a profound commentary on shifting identities and the boundaries of "self."

I highly recommend the video, and not just because the guy in it is incredibly hot (but true to form as a Russian man, ends up being a TOTAL jerk...he also ends up dead, but I don't want to ruin the ending for ya!). If you want to read a blow by blow of what happens in the video, you can follow this link and check out the narrative by used Keith133 describing the video -- very funny (scroll down).

Squeeze Your Horn

Back in Kabul, Cate and I sometimes remarked (not with surprise, but more with bemusement) on the frequent crotch-grabbing and groin-adjusting that men would do (I find it to be more frequent in Cairo, actually...just for the record), a phenomenon named by a friend of Cate's as the "Mexican Grab" (off-colour nature of the term duly acknowledged). I realized, day before yesterday, when my taxi driver, embarrassed after attempting to make a U-Turn against traffic and driving up on the traffic divider (me shouting the 4 words of Arabic I know in every possible permutation to try to say SOMETHING of meaning), pulled out onto a nearly-empty (surprisingly empty) road, looked around, and honked his horn!

To distill the puzzling element of this story for the fatigued reader: HE HONKED HIS HORN AFTER SEEING THAT THERE WERE NO CARS ANYWHERE AROUND US.

It was at that moment that I realized that his horn honking was functionally equivalent to the Mexican Grab -- it's like the Mexican Grab on wheels! Don't get me wrong....many taxi drivers manage to execute the traditional Mexican Grab while driving, but I did realize that the same way that men hover around on street corners or bridges, or lean on their parked cars watching passersby and asserting their presence by grabbing their genitals, my taxi driver was marking out his space on the road with his unnecessary honk.

LSAT Tomorrow

Well my LSAT is tomorrow, and I just got an extremely sweet and encouraging call from Madame Wong. Despite the fact that in more than 30 practice tests over the past 4 years I have NEVER gotten a perfect score, she is highly convinced that I am going to "ace it," and I like the sound of that. My last practice test is done, I feel as prepared as I can be, and I'm looking forward to getting it done with. I don't want to focus on negative things, right now, like the fact that I visited the testing center (a hole of a place called AMIDEAST) and it was a chaotic nightmare (which was really just a warm up for the total incompetence I would face later in the day at AUC with regard to the THIRTEEN THOUSAND DOLLARS they owe me).

I will say that I feel like I have a lot of things going for me on this exam, from studious practice, to good omens, to really smart ancestors watching over my shoulder (and hopefully whispering some correct answers to the games section in my ear!). I took a photo of my prep station (the table I have never sat for a single meal at in my flat), which I realized looks absurd because I'm so picky about the light that I actually sit with TWO lamps right next to each other on the table. An equally absurd (but not LSAT-related) photo that I'm including is of the six pair of shoes that are strewn about my living room. I was wondering why my apartment felt messy even though it's clean, and then I realized that it's because (in such a small flat) there are shoes EVERYWHERE! You can also see both pair of black thong sandals that I referred to in a previous post.

I promised some metaphysical stuff, which is simply that in the last 1-2 weeks, basically everyone I know has had amazing things happen to them in terms of their goals/future aspirations. I might actually have to limit my congratulatory shout-outs, at this point, because I could (thank God) fill my blog with the great things that are happening to the people that I love. You've already read about Masry's hiring in Poland, Curie's half-marathon training, Juicy's successes in her infectious disease studies, and Barbie's recent interview successes, and you throw in Shakira getting hired to tutor Ruby and it's really a lot of good news, recently!

New good news is Desi getting an interview and some positive replies on the american legal academia job market (there has to be a less clumsy way of saying that!), and Curie getting accepted into the epigenetics lab she has been drooling over for a couple years, now (you know she wants it if she's willing to leave the Nobel Prize winning lab she's in, now, to go there). I'm sure I'm forgetting other good news to report...but the point is that now is a good time for me and the people I love, and I think that's good news for my LSAT.

Quick note about Curie's new lab. I'll keep the identity of the lab anonymous, but I have included a photo just so that we can all engage in some collective suspicion over what exactly top scientists do except fret over what colours to use on their whiteboards. I'm sorry, but looking at this photo from her lab, I'm not sure if she's getting her PhD in biology, or her MFA in Primitive Art (it's very Mondrian meets Damian Hirsch!).

Guess that's it, for now. I'll try to report to my eager readers, tomorrow, how my LSAT went. Don't be sad if I end up saying that I didn't finish the first section and walked out...I did fine the first time :) lol...but let's hope Wong was Wight on this one.

VC